Monday, October 20, 2014

Letter to my Dog

My Luigi

They say dogs come into our lives to teach us about love, and they depart to teach us about loss. I’ve heard plenty about pets and dogs these last few days, as friends and family try to comfort me from my recent loss, and I realize everyone has a special story about the bond they’ve once shared with a four-legged buddy. This is what I would tell my buddy if I could hold him one more time; I always did think he could understand what I was saying…

"It is impossible to put into words the happiness you brought into my life. You filled my days with laughter, light, life and unconditional love, and for that I will forever be grateful. Originally you belonged to someone else, but only now do I understand you were always destined for me, or maybe I was destined for you.

You’re not here anymore to greet me every time I come home, you don’t follow my every step around the house, you don't wag your tail when I smile at you, you don’t sleep or wake by my side anymore. The whole house feels quiet, too quiet and lonely; Oh! you can’t imagine how lonely it feels. Now there is only pain, a lot of it. Your absence, the absence of your smell, your many sounds, the sight of your wet paw prints all over the house… just the memory of you hurts. They say it will continue to hurt, until one day it won’t.  They say one day it will stop hurting  and someday I will be able to smile again when I think of you and the brief time we shared. 

They also say eventually I must move one, whatever that means, but for now, just for now I want to hold on to every memory I have of you, every smell, every wag of your tail I can remember, every look you ever gave me, every toy you ever fetched, every trick you ever taught me, every white thin hair I still find on my black clothes…

You were taken from me too soon. But maybe you’d taught me all I needed to know about loyalty and love. Maybe you needed to leave me on my own to be able to put in practice everything I ever learned from you. But Oh! how I wish you hadn’t…

It doesn’t cease to amaze me how much a tiny creature could do for my soul. You were the most loyal companion I’ve ever had. You taught me about unconditional love more than any human being ever has. You changed my life. You changed the way I love and my understanding of love. You made my days brighter. You kept me company at the worst of times, you cheered me up, you brought me back to life. You saved me. I wish I could’ve saved you back.

And to those who say or think you were "just a dog", I can only wish for them that once in their lifetime they are lucky enough to encounter, recognize and love a creature as marvelous as you were.

I will continue to miss you, even after it stops hurting. Until then, I’ll hold you again in my dreams tonight…"